Rap

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No.  I don’t think you are.

Source:  PlayUsOut

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The first installment of Chap-Hop superstar Mr.B the Gentleman Rhymer’s ‘Histories’ series.  Directed by Dave Alexander.

It took me a second to get into this one, but it grew on me.  It is a basically a bunch of classic hip-hop joints with a new twist.  Worth a watch for the sheer dorkiness and jolly good use of the banjolele.  Yes, the banjolele.

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This interview starts off slow, but is magical by the end.  Stick with it.  So worth it.  Although…The Shat is so strange that everything he is in is magical.

Exhibit A)

Source:  Topless Robot

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EMBED-Punch-Out Rap – Watch more free videos

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One of those, ‘This amuses me, thus it will amuse everyone else,’ posts.

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People Joaquin Phoenix

Remember when Joaquin started his unadvised “Rap” career?  Well I have been of the opinion for a bit that it is pretty much a hoax.  Others have thought so as well, whereas Phoenix retorts with the arguement that people are “jealous”.  Yeeeeeahhhh…

Joaquin, or as I saw on Videogum — “Whoaquin Carex” recently showed up on David Letterman acting out of it.  Seriously if this is a stunt it was funny for like five minutes.  Now it is just turning into self-important shit.  Does he think he is Andy Kaufman?  Has he been smelling all the sanctimonious BS that Gwyneth “GOOP” Paltrow is tossing around?  Dave makes a couple of good quips but other than that Joaquin is getting pretty effin stale.

Watch the clip from David Letterman after the cut…Bah-Jow!

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I am actually kind of shocked that this happened so fast.  It isn’t quite as impressive or hilarious as Katy Perry’s spill, but Joaquin has already fallen off a stage.  He couldn’t even justify it with a bad-ass performance.  At least the fall was entertaining.

Check-ch-check-check-check-ch-check out Joaquin’s “rapping skills” after the cut.

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joaquin-bye-good-500x276

So Joaquin is really going to leave show biz (at least for a while) and peruse a misguided career in music.  Ok, whatever, we know he is a bit unbalanced, but when I think of Joaquin Phoenix doing music I think of him waxing poetic with an acoustic guitar or at the very most rocking it up with that dirty homeless musician look he has going.  Neither of these options are in his plans.  He wants to be a rapper.  Really Joaquin?  Really?

To top off this train wreck sundae, Casey Affleck is going to film Phoenix’s misadventure for a documentary.  This movie is going to be the most hilarious and tragic film since Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo.

The Hollywood Reporter says:

Phoenix is embarking on a new path as a rapper, with an album to be produced by Sean Combs. He is scheduled to make his first public performance Friday at a Las Vegas club, which will officially kick off Affleck’s shoot.

Source: The Blemish

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Most of the slang that Snoop Dog is teaching Martha Stewart is pretty outdated.  I think it is a trap!  Although their sexual chemistry is palpable, though what rap star doesn’t have chemistry with Martha.

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